Social media is a wonderful tool when you use it correctly. It’s great for keeping up with friends and family and for connecting with people that you wouldn’t otherwise get to connect with. But what happens when social media goes wrong? What happens when an acquaintance decides that we’re not good enough to be Facebook friends? What if you were that acquaintance that wanted to disconnect from the other, what would you do? Probably not this.
I love a good compliment sandwich as much as the next person. (Does anyone REALLY like them? If you do, please leave a comment and help me understand why) But this one just went a little too far for me. Let me give you a little background.
We’ll call this particular person Ashley. I’m not one to call out a person by name, so we’ll stick with Ashley.
Ashley and I met in 2010 I believe. It was after I had lost my job at a college that shall not be named and was really getting into social media. I had started consulting for a few companies and met with Ashley because she did web stuff too. It seemed like a good connection that where we could send referrals to one another. After our first in person meeting, Ashley and I connected on LinkedIn and Twitter. I believe after meeting a few more times we became Facebook friends.
Now let’s get one thing straight. I’ll absolutely admit that I’m not very active on Facebook. I have my reasons but for both my personal account and for Blogger Effect, I don’t find it that useful. Sure, I like to keep up with friends and family and read updates but I’m really more of a lurker if that’s the term you want to use. It doesn’t matter if it’s Ashley or my BFF, unless it’s something freakin’ awesome, you most likely won’t hear from me.
To get back to it, about a month ago I received the following message via Facebook from Ashley. This is after being connected for a number of years.
Hi there, Catrina!
I know we’ve been Facebook friends for some time now and have noticed that we really haven’t interacted with each other on this platform.
To help increase my level of connections here, I’ve decided to limit my personal account to close friends and family.
Of course, I still want to connect with you because… well… you rock! (and sandwich)
I’m thinking that maybe one of these other options may be suited better to your busy lifestyle and how you use social media. Please choose those that, you feel, would give us a better opportunity to increase our connection to help each of us become better people in life and business.
Facebook page: link removed
LinkedIn: link removed
Twitter: link removed
Thanks so much for your awesome understanding and I look forward to connecting with you in a more meaningful way online!Ashley
Now, don’t misunderstand, I really could care less if Ashley and I are Facebook friends. I think people take Facebook friends way too seriously. If I don’t see you face-to-face but we keep up with each other on Facebook, great! If not, that’s ok too.
My problem with this is that it’s insulting and generic.
Since Ashley felt that she needed to take the time to write a note, at least write it to me! We are already connected on LinkedIn and Twitter so why would you bring up those “options” to me? Oh, yeah because you sent this same thing to 50 other Facebook friends.
The other problem is that it defaults to another issue where we all feel like we have to announce everything that we are doing. You don’t want to be Facebook friends? You feel that we are better suited to connect on Twitter? Then unfriend me. I don’t need you to announce to me what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. I can take a hint, and if it matters I’ll ask you about it.
So now your turn, have you ever run into something like this or done it yourself? Do you think Ashley is wrong or right in her approach? I’m interested to hear what you have to say – always looking for other points of view!